Resolving, not resolutions

January 4, 2012

My new years resolution is not to make any other new years resolutions.

This is because I have decided I don’t need any goals this year. They almost always feel like pressure and they have the tendency to turn into sticks which I can then use to beat myself with.

My usual habit is to think of a gazillion things I want to do or feel like I should do, and then feel bad that I didn’t do any of them.

So instead I think I am better off planning as little as possible and staying as commitment-free as possible. And just to be clear, it’s not like I don’t have anything to which I have already committed. I don’t intend to drop my current commitments, instead I just want to actively avoid taking on more.

I don’t want to save the world this year. I don’t want to pursue physical transformation or spiritual enlightenment.

I want to do not much of anything significant. Instead my intention is to do fun things.

I will keep blogging, crafting and blogging about crafting, parenting and feminist musings. I’ll take the time to enjoy space, time and being non-busy. I’ll spend time with people I like and continue to do good things if they make me feel good (as most of it does).

But I will also make sure that time for myself is a priority, time with my kids is also and sometimes a free weekend should be just that; a free weekend.

And why?

Because in the last two months of being unemployed I have thoroughly enjoyed being more stress-free than I’ve been in years. The last 1.5-ish years at my previous job were super hard, but actually the last year or so at the job before that was no picnic either.

I’m known for being an overachieving do-it-all and I’ve had people ask me; ‘how do you do it?’. Well the answer is that it’s come at a cost. That cost was down time, social life and sanity. My kids would walk in to the room while I was cooking demanding attention and I would feel impatient, frown, snap.

I am planning to not plan this year because I’ve actually already got enough on my plate. My to-do list is long and it doesn’t need lengthening.

Instead I want to continue my new habit of listening intently when my kids tell me their latest fantastical tale and then asking them what happened next. I want to enjoy time to think and talk and hang out and read and do whatever else feels good (within reasonable adult parameters).

Sounds like a plan to me.

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